Do you know what spoils the possibility of most relationships starting off?
It is simply because of Ego
Everybody has an ego. It is that self-centered part of us, that is also necessary for survival. The Ego can be useful in handling certain people or difficult situations. The problems start when the ego gets out of control and begins to consume behaviors, attitudes, and relationships.
A typical situation is this:
You are hanging out with a woman you’ve been out with a couple of times. You enjoy each others company, and you know it. You’re really having a good time, and then suddenly one of you gets scared – which always happens. One person gets scared or even both of you.
So all of a sudden, she doesn’t text you back right away, or she doesn’t call like before. And what do you do?
Your ego works by protecting yourself, and you just say to yourself, forget this – it’s not going to work out.
In reality, it is your ego protecting you from becoming vulnerable.
Then you rationalize to yourself and immerse yourself in work or whatever you do. That is Your ego just trying to protect you the entire time.
But you see, Life might just accept one more phone call. Call that person out and simply say, “Hey there, what’s going on? I don’t understand it. We were having a good time, and then you suddenly blanked out. What’s going on?”
By calling somebody out, you’re probably going to get an answer that will be far different than you ever expected. Maybe she just needed that little nudge.
Women like to feel secure. Probably she got a bit scared and insecure, and when a woman is scared, She just wants to be protected by her man.
A genuine man is going to make her feel secure and safe. That’s what women crave – that feeling of protection and security. Women are natural nesters. They look at you as a potential father or husband, and they want to feel very safe with you.
And by you saying, damn it, and just walking away, you demonstrated to her that the little doubt she had about you was 100% accurate. Just because you had to protect your ego and your fear of vulnerability, You wanted to save face.
And just think about it, who could you be saving face from? Her friends if she talks to them or your friends? So If you call her and just ask her what’s up, she’s going to run to her friends and say: “Collins called, and he wants to know what’s up with me. What should I do?” If her friends see that she likes you, they will be encouraging her to call you.
So guess what? Your ego just guarded you against nothing.
Always remember that you are not just your ego except you decide to give up control of yourself to it. It is simply a part of you. You are a spiritual creature with a soul and much more than your ego. You have a heart, which has the capability to love, care, understand, accept, and feel kindness.
Secondly, don’t forget that your heart takes a back seat when your ego is in charge. Learn to live your life from your heart instead of your mind. It might be Difficult, yes, but absolutely necessary for happiness.